Irritable.  Cranky.  Ill tempered.  Old?

We often hear “crotchety old man or woman.”  Is that the destiny for ALL PEOPLE?  I see it all the time and it is one of my lifetime goals not to ever get that way.  Are they bored?  Is it engrained in the brain?  Are they going with the crowd?

Gossip and negativity and boredom and judgmental behavior can spread like wildfire.  However, the fire can stop with you.  Be the fire extinguisher.  Be the water.  Be something!  We all have bad days, but it’s only a day.  It’s not your life.  Wake up and smile and send out positive vibrations.

Pick up a new hobby.  Find your tribe.  Try a new food.  Try a new workout.  Do yoga.  Dance.  Take a walk in the sunshine.  Volunteer your time.  Smile at a stranger.  Step away from the crowd when something isn’t making you 1000% your best self.  It’s never too late…or too early.  

What is your tool to fight crotchetiness?

Whoopi Goldberg.  I peeped her on Harry Connick, Jr.’s talkshow briefly the other day talking about women.  She was talking about pms and cramps and it made me finish watching the segment.  She was talking about a product that I believe she has created to alleviate cramps…an all-natural topical cream or ointment of some kind.  Harry then asks “Well, can you describe the pain to me?”  She grins and the audience howls.  Picture your balls being pulled to the ground…Then stomped on…AND THEN rolled up into a rolling pin…she says.  He is speechless.

The days of my cramps being exactly like that are far gone, but the other symptoms are still there and it’s just dawned on me that I have more than PMS.  I believe I have PMDD.  I have thoughts of death.  I’m anxious, depressed, sad, angry.  Not fun!

Watching Whoopi gave a face to my feelings.  Women’s health is SO SO SO misunderstood.  Brushed off.  Looked at as dramatic.  Both by men and by women who have never experienced any of these things.  I have met these women and I am often jealous that they don’t have to deal with this.

So on today, INTERnational Women’s Day, I feel appreciated and I send my appreciation and love to ALL women on this planet Earth.  Be you.  All day.  Every day.  Your truth is a beacon of hope for other women.  Even if we all end up in the “period tent.”  I’m down!

Cheers!

SP 🙂

I need help.  I’d love to form a local group among stay-at-home moms to barter our services.  You come hang with my kid and I get stuff done.  I go hang with your kid and you get stuff done.

I feel like my brain is constantly thinking of the million and one things I have to do.  Then I just reheat my coffee, sit down, and eat my hours old toast.  This mom gig is no joke!  I just posted about needing a tribe and now I’m executing a plan (hopefully.). Please share this post with whomever you’d think would be interested.  I thank you.  Phoenix thanks you.  Gabe thanks you.  We need a sane mama over here.

Cheers! 🍻🍻

…of a stay-at-home mom.

Picture it: 2016

Daddy is leaving for work.  It’s 7:30 am.  Baby and I are waking up.  (Baby is far ahead of me.)

I am beyond tired and whip the boob out for baby.  Maybe I can get a few more moments of rest.  Nope.

Baby spits up on sheets.  I take her to get changed.  She pees on the changing table and her jammies.  So those go on the floor and a new outfit is picked out.  We proceed to the kitchen where she happily plays with her toys in her highchair.  I stumble around like a zombie, get the coffee pot started, open the mail from the day before.  A bill from the pediatrician….We have two insurances, how is the amount transferred from primary to patient?  I don’t really want to call these people…ugh.  Always on hold and never good customer service.

I make my eggs and toast.  Suck it down with my coffee.  Then I give baby her broccoli and then nurse her.  As she’s nursing, she gets distracted and milk proceeds to leak on the couch.  Ugh.  More cleaning to do later.  She continues and falls asleep.  Do I move her so I can get some things done?  Do I snuggle with her?  All while looking at the toys strewn across the floor, the socks that need to be paired and put away, the floor that needs vacuuming, the bathroom rugs that need to be brought to the washer, the re-usable shopping bags that need to be brought back to the car, the kleenex that needs to be put away, the shoe boxes that either need to be thrown away or put somewhere to use later….You get the picture.

My coffee has gotten cold.  Phoenix is now in her swing, wide awake.  Hopefully, she’ll snooze a bit.  I’m writing now.  Not feeling like doing a single thing.  But, there are dishes to be put away, more dishes to wash, wash that needs to go into dryer, clothes that need to be hung up, baby’s clothes need to be washed, baby’s bath toys need to be put away from last night…

To be continued….going to hopefully get some of this done.

Transferred frozen breast milk to freezer downstairs, put some groceries away from last night, refilled my coffee cup.  Picked up some toys.  Feefs is now cranky so I need to attend to her.  Another pause….

Feefs is happily playing on her play mat.  Rolling around like a pig in mud.  hehe.  We were worried (no not really) that she was never going to roll.  Her chunky self just took her time.

I just fed her and now she’s sleeping peacefully in the swing.  We still use it at 7 months old.  I’m sure some people will have opinions about that.  I look at it like this…the weight limit goes up to 30 pounds so I’m going to use it up to the max.

I put on the ID channel while feeding her and am now hooked to a show called Murder Book.  Oye.  However, baby’s clothes are in the washer, and to my surprise, daddy put the wash in the dryer so that was ready to come out.  Score.  Socks are paired, clean dishes are put away.

I have ideas for dinner plans.  Cauliflower cream pasta with herbs and/or brown rice bowl with edamame and tamari scallion sauce.  Preparing that is also something on my to-do list.

I continue to drink my not-so-hot coffee.  Taking a breather as I write this and finish the show for the next 20ish minutes.  I figure she’ll need to eat around 330ish and/or when she wakes up.  I fill out my review for a dining experience I just had to earn mileage for American Airlines.

Welp.  Baby is awake and fighting to go back to sleep.

She’s asleep.  I’m hungry.  Have leftovers?  Spend time making something?  Sigh.

So, I had ice cream.  For lunch.  Baby is up again.  She is loving her little giraffe and I’m sitting with her.  It’s really windy out and I feel like she needs to be with me.  Haha.  What.  I don’t know.

The laundry is still in the washer.  It’s freakin cold down there.  Ellen is on TV.  That is one of my must-watch shows.  Jeopardy is the other.  It’ll be 5, I need to shower because we are trying to make Spanish Family Time for All Ages at the library at 6:30.  They also have Story Time for 0-2 year olds.  At 10.  On Tuesdays and Thursdays.  I wish I could attempt to even make that.  Not a morning person and need boatloads of sleep.  Ah!

If this post seems distracted.  It is.  I feel like this every single day.  Like I can’t catch up.  Like I’m barely getting by.  Forget taking a shower and getting myself anywhere near presentable.  I feel like I have ADHD, multiplied.  I have to remind myself it won’t be like this forever, or the anxiety will get the best of me.

When all else fails and I have so much to do, I sometimes end up doing none of it whatsoever.  So. Freakin.  Productive.

 

stay at home mom

For what you ask?

Baby will be crawling anytime now and we have many dangerous situations for that in our home.  Coffee table: on it’s way out.  Outlets: have their covers.  Cabinets: we need to secure.  But what else?  I’m a new mom and sometimes that means feeling less than intelligent.  I mean, I have a college degree, yet somedays I question its accuracy.

A crawling baby means a whole lot of new doors opening (literally and figuratively).  Will I get ANYTHING done?  Baby is awake for longer periods now so I have less time to focus on things.  I feel forgetful.  I feel tired.  Prepping house is the last thing I want to worry about.  But prepping is what needs to be done.  Baby will remind me of that when she’s sailing down the hallway on all fours and I’m chasing her because I forget to secure the gate at the top of the stairs.

Fifi buns has just completed her 7 month on this earth.  It has flew by.  She has such a personality (and a bite of steel…ouch!).  We just raised her exer-saucer.  A friend gave her a walking toy for Christmas.  Yet, we still use the swing….yes we do…and will until the 30 pound limit.  So many different ways to do things for babies.

So I’d like to hear from you seasoned parents.  What are your “prepping house” suggestions?  I’m at a loss and want to hear from you before I google it.  Thanks!

I decided to delete my Facebook account.  Permanently.  Yes, permanently.  Didn’t know you could do this?

Yes.  Yes, you can.  They just don’t make it an easy thing to find out how to do.

I got tired of seeing family doing things together, without me or my little family.  It’s always been that way so I don’t know why I get bothered, still.  I got tired of seeing so-called friends getting together with others, after failed attempts at trying to get together with us too.  Priorities, not busy as they say.  The friends I do have that are what I think of the real definition will be available by phone, or in person.  What a thought!

I am disgusted at the way social media has changed the way people have relationships.  So disgusted.  People need real contact.  Real people contact.  Facial expressions in real time, tones of voices, human touch.  I hope to teach my daughter what those are.

My boyfriend will stay on Facebook, so we are going to advertise my blog still through there.  He doesn’t get as bothered with it.  Maybe it’s a woman thing.  What else is new?  There are so many “woman things.”

If you’d like to know how to permanently delete your account and come back to the real world please shoot me a message or leave a comment.  You won’t regret it.  Maybe your house will even look cleaner.

Peace.

“Mindfulness means maintaining a moment-by-moment awareness of our thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment.”

Practicing mindfulness is imperative for our society.  Everyone is constantly on the go.  Work.  Kids’ activities.  More work.  More kids’ activities.  It’s easy to let time slip by and not check in to ourselves.

Checking-in will help to reduce stress by recognizing it and finding a solution.  The constant adrenaline rush will no doubt lead to a body crash.  To get out of that hole will require more than a “check-in.”

Meditation and yoga are good ways to practice mindfulness.  These can be 5 minutes to 105 minutes.  That’s the beauty of it.  It is easily adaptable to everyone’s situation.  Shoot.  Meditate on the toilet.  In the shower.  Those things are not easily avoided…. I hope.

Checking in means to ask yourself what it is you are feeling…good, bad, happy, sad, angry, anxious…you name it.  Then asking yourself if you know the cause.  You got a promising job, your cat died last night, you won the lotto (ahhhh… i know we all wish…), your sibling is clueless to her nasty behavior, you’re a new mom (ohemgeeee…hello anxiety).  The key now is to come to a calm place.

Stay in the now.  Realize you can only control YOUR behavior, no one else’s.  If needed, keep yourself away from certain people when they are acting up.  Don’t go crazy with your lottery winnings…. 😉               Set up a nice goodbye ceremony for your pet and keep a memento for you to have good memories.  Being sad is ok.  Love your child.  That’s really all you need to do.  BREATHE.

Yoga also gets your body moving, which gets the feel good serotonin flowing.  Why not kill two birds with one stone?  Stretch/tone your body and practice breathing, both which will make you feel at ease.  If you want to double the benefit…do it outside.  Nature is a wonderful natural mood booster.

Yoga teaches you how to delve into poses that may put a (healthy) strain on certain parts of the body, holding those poses, breathing through them, then letting go.  This transfers into your daily life right?  Learning how to hold yourself in a certain situation then letting it go.

It blows my mind that this “trend” of mindfulness is only recently gaining steam.  However, I guess it should be no surprise in a country where people “live to work” rather than “work to live.”  I’ve always known that if you aren’t ok emotionally, how in the hell are you suppose to produce quality work?  But, I guess I have always been an old soul too.

So I want you to take a break today.  Relax.  Recharge.  Even if it is on your only 30 minute break that you get within your 8 hour shift.  (Which is totally wrong and can be another post altogether).

Cheers to a productive week!  Make it count and if something has weighed on you for a while now…it’s time to shit or get off the pot.

 

Feeling what?  Anything.  It’s ok.

Society makes you feel like having feelings = having a mental disorder.  That’s crap!  It’s being human.

I’ve finally gotten to a point that I am okay with expressing whatever I am feeling.  And I appreciate people who also are okay with it.  Being sad does not equal being depressed.  Being able to smile at someone you can’t stand does not equal being bipolar.

Being women, we tend to feel more which makes men think we are crazy.  Don’t let them make you feel that way.  A real man will understand the different emotions and try to help you through them.

My mind is like a computer with way too many tabs open these days.  Sometimes I feel like crying because it’s so overwhelming.  Having to put on a happy face for my daughter is sometimes hard to do.  That just snowballs the overwhelming feeling.

Music helps a great deal.  If I could live in the radio, I would.  I’ve never been able to put my feelings on hold for any situation, including work.  I give props to those who can.

I have this weird sense that can detect how another person is feeling, most of the time.  I can tell when someone is or is not interested in a conversation.  When I call people out on it, the ones that get defensive are the ones that I’m not interested in dealing with anymore.  Clearly, they know they’ve been found out.

I like my alone time.  Partly because I’ve become accustomed to it and partly because it allows me to get through my emotional roller coaster on my own.  Anyone talking to me or trying to help sometimes doesn’t know how and that makes me want to scream.

I’ve never wanted to be in one place for a long time.  Putting roots somewhere actually gives me a bad feeling.  I need change.  I need new faces.  I need new air.  I need diversity.  I need new scenery.  I have a constant thirst to learn.

Whatever you are feeling today, FEEL IT.  There is nothing wrong with you.

<3 <3 <3  Peace.

 

 

My boyfriend and I are not glued to our phones nearly as much as some people we know.  But we still want to be aware and not let it get out of hand.  We’ve made a no phone in our bedroom rule.  I only break it when he’s working late… 😉

It allows us to check ourselves.  It allows us to talk to each other.  It allows us to decompress for a good night’s sleep.  It’s not hard.  We are both on board, that is the important part.

It’s actually a relieving feeling.  Out of sight, out of mind.  We can respond to texts the next morning.  We can check Facebook, Instagram, emails, etc., the next morning.

I’ve read that not only does the persistent need to check social media, etc., interfere with bedtime, but the glow of the phone also tends to trick your brain into not recognizing the dark of the room, preventing it from getting ready for sleep.

I’d really like to ditch the phone altogether, but that may take a bit more preparation…like getting a good quality camera. I love taking pictures and that is why I generally like to have my phone on me at all times.

Think about making a no-phone rule at your house.  It’s not as difficult as you think.  Mind over matter….errr….mind over phone in this case.

 

John Legend radio on Pandora plays a lot of piano instrumentals.  Listening to this while having a “I don’t want to do shit today” mood puts me in a place far, far away.  I feel like crying at any minute.

There are dishes in the sink, bottles to be sanitized, lunch and dinner to be thought of.  Baby is napping, thankfully.

Days like these, I think about a lot of things.  I think about the 3-year-old Syrian Aylan Kurdi who was found drowned washed up on a Turkish beach.  I think about the life my daughter will have.  I think about my mom who died 11 years ago this month, I think about society being so blinded by money and not by good intentions, I think about the people who smile and tell you one thing yet act another.

Being empathetic has its ups and downs.  Constantly putting yourself in other’s shoes; wanting to give happiness to everyone, even when they have wronged you time and time again; feeling sad when a loved one feels sad.  I don’t meet to many people who also feel like this.  Those that I have met, I truly am grateful for their friendship.  The world is never too big for people like us.  We want to travel and explore and meet other souls like us.

These days will come and they will go.  I am just experiencing the moment.  You don’t know happiness without knowing sadness.

Perhaps, my being tired is also contributing to this.  I am now on the couch writing, using Phoenix’s Boppy pillow as my coffee cup holder.  There are always multiple uses for everything, right?